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You could even hint that in the absence of companionship, you might have to lean a lot more heavily on them — and you don't want to do that. You could gently remind them that they made quite a few along the way too — and that there is a skill to dating that you have to re-learn. When things start getting serious, introduce your boyfriend or girlfriend to your family in small doses and with no big fanfare.

Remember, first impressions and conversations are important. When things get serious with you and a new love, ask your kids about issues that might concern them.

If your date is sensitive to your kids' feelings, it's much more likely that he'll be greeted with an open mind and given a fair chance. If they're worried about financial matters, let them know you'll take measures (such as a prenuptial agreement) that will protect your (and their) interest — as well as their future.

Children are protective of their parents, no matter their — or your — age.

They tend to think no one is good enough for mom or dad, no one's motives are pure, and every new person you bring around is either a gold digger, a spendthrift or someone who will tear you away.

Things get even touchier when you put sex into the equation: It's hard enough for kids to think about their parents in bed together, much less you and someone else.

Of course you shouldn't let those considerations stand in the way of your personal life. Even if there's no one special in your life, talk to your adult children about why you want to meet someone.

For Wendy Diez, it was the e-mail from the preschool teacher addressed to “Mr. Diez.” For Jeannie French, it was schools not offering babysitting on parent-teacher night.

And Catholic singles groups filled with men who had no interest in dating a woman with children.

Stay up to date with Single Parent Family Ministry events and information by signing up to receive our SPF news letter.

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If children seem concerned that you won't be as committed to them, remind them they are first in your heart and will never be displaced. If your children are unhappy about a relationship that is working for you, have a heart-to-heart conversation about what's bothering them.

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